"没有灵魂的学生" is what I've been - day in, day out. So pardon me for not blogging. How could a soul-less person ever be blogging?

I've got so much to say! The mad desire to blog before I actually explode and die in the school battlefield.

School

Ok I know you already know what I'm going to say. But hey there's definitely more to "been busy, doing reports, studying for tests " yada yada right? Because other than the above mentioned, there's still of course a wonder drug called Prozac out there. Yup. The word school should be synonymous to the word "Prozac" on top of mundane things like tests and reports. FYI, Prozac is an anti-depressant drug. Think I really might go get some if things continue like it had been for the past month.

But don't get me wrong... it's not that this course at Massey sucks or anything. On the contrary, it's a degree programme which I have confidence will come to fruition at the very end. You have no idea how wonderful our Kiwi lecturers have been!! They're super nice and helpful .... something which I'm sure I won't be able to get if I had stupidly put down my choice for NUS or NTU several months ago.

Fierce, is what I'd describe this degree programme as. I know people are probably sick of receiving my replies of "Not free, sorry!" at days end. It's true! I'm stuck at school 7 days a week - SEVEN bloody days a week! Reports after reports, tests after tests and *Kaboom* the exam arrives. Don't believe me?

Week 1:

18 hours of Physical Chemistry lectures within 3 days, 2 days of practical with follow-up reports (How's doing 2 reports within 2 days and submitting it 24 hours after completing the experiment sounds like to you, huh? HUH?) Weekends - Mad rush to study for the Physical Chemistry test on the ccoming monday.

Week 2:

Physical Chemistry test on MONDAY. (How more horrible can it get? :( )

2 more practical experiments = 2 more reports.

Weekend - Mad rush to finish digesting Physical chemistry notes and tutorials before Organic chemistry starts and the vicious cycle repeats.

Week 3:

Organic Chemistry lecture starts. Three practical sessions a week. 6 hours of doing practical work in the lab on monotonous thursdays. Weekends - mad rush to study for the coming Organic Chemistry test on MONDAY. One test per fortnight. Argh - I'd pay you to kill me.

Week 4:

Food chemistry lecture starts as well. Same old evil cycle. Oh, so you think there's gonna be another test on the following week again? Nope! But "Yay!" my foot - because next Thursday's the final examination for 123.220 Advanced Chemistry for Technology module. Phyorganisical Chemistry. Organosical chemistry. No wait - I mean, Physical AND Organic Chemistry both to study for the exam. I'd pay you double to kill me -.-" .

Yep... so today, 4th October Saturday is the weekend 3 days after the examination bulldozer rammed over me like cheap asphalt. Supposed to be doing my formal report now which is due this coming Thursday ... but nothing's coming out from my brain anymore. Nothing. Like a same old green tea bag which has been poured with hot water for the 63rd time. You just get your plain water back instead of green tea - know what I mean? :(

Maybe life wouldn't be so disastrous if I hadn't had such compelling expectations to meet. Not anyone else's expectations, but my own. Getting first class honours for this programme can only mean a permanent immigration out of Singapore. PhD in new zealand after graduation. New life. New home. New people. I want to leave this place so badly my desperation's driving me up the wall. Who really understands? Why do I want to leave? Maybe someday you'll know. Or perhaps not ... ever.

Ok but I'm not totally cutting off my social life though. Thank god for the class outings, even if it's just a few hours for me to let off some serious steam. I love my classmates! Haha. I even end up seeing some of them for 7 days a week. Well... c'est la vie!

Will post class outing pics and other more life-related stuff the next time. (Will there be a next? :X ) Tata!